Saturday, February 10, 2007

The sweet that broke the camel's tooth

Something in this story from the AP just doesn't add up... Woman breaks tooth, wants town to pay (AP) ABINGTON, Mass. - Trying to get something done at town hall can be a pain, one local woman says for her it was literally. Joanne Harding broke a tooth on a Tootsie Roll-- Hold the phone! Broke her tooth on a TOOTSIE ROLL???
--broke a tooth on a Tootsie Roll she took from a candy jar in the town clerk's office in Abington Town Hall last month during a visit to get a license for her dog.
Now, Harding wants the town to help pay her $4,000-$5,000 dental bill.
"I took the candy, so it's partially my fault," the 40-year-old Harding told the Patriot Ledger of Quincy. "I wouldn't have taken it if it wasn't there."
Town Manager Phillip Warren Jr. forwarded Harding's request for financial assistance to the town's insurance carrier.
"We'll wait to see what the insurance company says," he said.
Meanwhile, the candy jars are still there at the clerk's office.

Lots wrong with this little epic! First, $5000 for one tooth? What were they made out of, platinum??? Granted, I don't know much about the state of economics and medicine in New England, but...
Second, "It's partially my fault. I wouldn't have taken it if it wasn't there"? What, did someone at the clerk's office MAKE you take a candy? I can see it now-- "Sorry, you can't be attended to until you have taken a candy from the jar!" Incredible. You have the audacity to admit fault, yet you want to hold the town a monetary hostage for YOUR mistake?
Third, broke a tooth on a Tootsie Roll? Just how long was that little treat sitting in that jar? Was it from 1997??
Lastly, and most incredulously-- if that's a proper phrase-- The jars are still at the office? That's smart. Now that everybody knows about this queer happenstance, open yourself up to more financial attacks by would-be gainers! No wonder taxes across the New England region are so high!

Another group of people helplessly sucked into the inescapable vortex of stupidity...


Since stupidity apparently knows no bounds, "PSST" will be renamed and retooled after the fifth presentation of the STUPIES! We'll be covering more things like this chickie-boo in MA and other asinine things people do that set them apart as... er, extremely stupid. Stay tuned!

2 comments:

Sariah said...

Do you have a new name picked out yet? Or are you going to hold a contest. Because that would be cool. And complicated (for you... sorry). If I were to rename your blog, it'd probably be something dumb like, "People Are Stupid" or "You're Stupid". It's funny in my head, but who knows if anyone else thinks so. ANYWAY... can't wait to see the latest Stupies!

Perpetual Chocoholic said...

you guys are sounding more and more Canadian all of the time. We don't have to use common sense for ourselves up here. It's everyone elses responsibility to make sure we don't do stupid things.