Stink Patrick's Day

Have people nothing better to talk about? 'Parently not!
The city of Scranton, PA, hosted their big drunk-fest, er, I mean, St. Patty's parade this past Saturday. (Supposedly, it's the third-largest shamrock celebration in the nation.) Many folks--myself included-- don't really care to venture downtown on that day, because what once was a family event is now nothing but a big, unending kegger, with bars opening up at 9:00. AM. By the time the parade starts at 11:30, most spectators are more blasted than an alien in Space Invaders.
Our local news-station, WNEP-16, has a unique little feature on their website (wnep.com) called "Talkback Online," in which people can post threads about a variety of topics covered on the news. I expected discussion about the parade and its unpleasantries, but I didn't expect a certain specific to be hung out like dirty laundry, no pun intended. The following are excerpts of posts, verbatim.
"Does any one know what the smell at the parade was? It was all over town! It smelled like urine or strong smelling flowers." Wow. time to get your sniffer checked!
I was at work on Saturday and when we would go outside I kept on saying, what is that smell. It was very odd. I really thought that I was the only one that was smelling it. Maybe it was all of the Beer mixed in with that downtown Scranton smell. ...And how does downtown smell compared to, say, West side?
We smelled that funky smell, too. After walking for a while and smelling it often, we wondered if it was the sewers. Wait. We've gone from strong-smelling flowers to sewage?
I left work early because I could not stand to smell it and watch the behavior!
How can something smell like urine or strong flowers? I find this description confusing. Couldn't agree with you more!
I do not go to the parade, I watch it on tv, I smell nothing bad. ...Except yourself?
...and the smell, some people has cans of spray that smelled like skunk... Urine, skunk, flowers, what's the difference? Apparently, none!
Aaaaaall-righty, then. We have firmly established that Scranton reeks on Parade Day. But what a potpourri of descriptions about the odor!

My favorite post had nothing to do with the reported odiferousness, however...
I think the bars should not be allowed to open so early and sell the drinks as fast as possible and for people to become drunk and stupid.

Excuse me-- BECOME stupid? No, I'm sure they were stupid way before they arrived for the festivities. The alcohol definitely augments the lack of intelligence, however. So, more accurately, "...people to become drunk and stupider."