Years ago, as I worked in my mid-management position for a major telecommunications company, a man from Tennessee joined our directory assistance team... His name was John, but we all called him "Big Show" due to the fact that he was about 6'4" and beefy, and had a voice like Elvis. Well, old Big Show wasn't exactly the most intellectually diligent person on earth. Sometimes, he just plain lacked common sense.
The ordeal began as he was taking calls while munching on some pretzel nuggets. (First, how'd you like to be requesting a phone number and hear the operator constantly crunching in your ear?) Well, I paid this no mind initially, until he loudly winced in pain. His hand was on his mouth. I watched as he ended his call, went to the bathroom, and then came back to tell me, "Ah chipped a tooth, and it hurts real bad, ya know." I looked, and indeed, he had. His top front tooth had severed in half.
I told him to talk to the office manager, which he did, and then left for the day.
The next day he came back, telling us he went to the oral surgeon and had it capped. That should have been the end of the story, but, if it were, you wouldn't be reading it!
No more than 5 days later, another cry of agony escaped Big Show's lips. This time I went to his desk to check on him.
"Ouch! Ah think ah just chipped muh tooth again! The same one!!!"
I looked down next to his keyboard, and saw a large stash of Life-Savers. "Were you just eating those?" I asked in doubtful anticipation.
John looked beside himself. "Well, yeah, but ah don't see what that has to do with anythin'."
Thfmmk yih, thfmmk yih fvrrmy moomphf.
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I'd tell you that since it appears that you have worked with a long long line of "special" people that maybe you should try working somewhere where there are an increased number of functioning brains, except then life wouldn't be as interesting for the us, the readers. So just sit back and continue to enjoy the special people for us.
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